Friday, September 21, 2007


im sad~!! upset~!! depressed~!! someone~!!!! plz comfort me~!!!!!!!!!

y me..

i juz dunno.. his ideal gurl cant b me.. i juz cant b his ideal 1.. im nt good enuf.. every1 in coll noes he ll b comin by juz lookin at wat i wore dat day.. dey notice de change.. bt he doesnt.. he expects more.. he compares.. wif ppl hu r in de same world as him.. bt mayb nt as me.. he doesnt un.. wat shud i do? i noe i ll nvr meet his expectations.. his ideal 1 is.. unreachable..

Saturday, September 15, 2007

im sry..

i cried till i fell asleep laz nite.. i wuz in a trauma.. i dunno wat 2 do.. dis mornin i woke up wif an headache n puffy eyes feelin real scared.. i noe it's my fault.. i'd been real stubborn.. i jz dun like ppl tellin me wat im doin is wrong when i tink i haf reasons 4 wat im doin now.. when i dont.. i dun like acceptin ppl's view n suggestion when i tink dey are nt true.. i noe ure doin it 4 own good.. bt feel pressured.. i cant cope wif pressure n stress.. im tired.. nt onli bcuz of copin wif studies.. wat i wanted 2 tell ya wuz i felt tired bcuz of my parents controllin me.. v can onli c each other once a week 4 less den 2hrs.. v hafta reli plan every outing reli nicely 2 make sure v spend our very lil time doin meaningful stuff n haf a lot of fun.. hafta make sure my parents dun find out abt us 2 make sure dey wont haf bad impression over u.. to watch wat i say when i tok 2 my parents so dat dey wont get angry over me n nt let me do wateva i wanna do includin seein u.. to make sure i dun accidentally tok abt couples issue in front of my parents.. can onli tok 2 u late in de nite.. muz close de conversation when my siblings approach me while v were chattin on9.. i reli dun mind all of dese.. bt juz feelin a lil exhausted.. juz wanted 2 hear ya.. didnt mean 2 fight wif ya.. i noe u did all of these 4 my own good.. im reli workin 2wards it.. otherwise.. i wont b askin u over 2 study wif me.. it's nt simply 2 create opportunity 2 meet ya.. i reli tot i can seek help on studies fr u.. i cry alot i cry over small issues.. it's nt bcuz i haf alot of tears o bcuz i simply like 2 cry.. it's bcuz wat u sat wat u do wat u tink affects me alot.. i cant stop fr knowin wat u feel wat u tink.. a single word fr u can make me feel happy 4 de whole day can hurt me very deeply.. i hope u ll un.. i u had been noticing.. i had tried 2 make myself independant compare 2 de old me.. i dun call ya suddenly n cry n tell ya i miss u.. i dun c wat other couples do kept bugging u.. i reli heart n need ya dear.. im sry 4 everythg i do dat had upset ya.. i serously didnt mean it.. it's hard 2 change one's attitude.. bt i ll try real hard.. plz give me some more time.. i love ya dear..